Trust

Trust – it is a hard one. When things aren’t going well for us, that’s very often when it is hard to trust.

On the macro level, we in the UK are now in the midst of arguably a major scandal involving Member of Parliament’s expense claims, where it seems quite a few have been claiming excessively at the taxpayers’ expense. The press are full of comments about a serious damage to trust, at a time when many more people are claiming job seekers’ allowance and others are finding their benefits reduced, right smack in the middle of a mega recession caused in part by bankers’ excesses, so we are told. People are angry. How can we trust them now, bankers and politicians? Who can we trust?

If you go to a micro level, when times are difficult for you, you might find it harder to trust other people. Let’s say you have lost your job. That can cause a breakdown in trust in employers. Let’s say your partner has just walked out on you or abused you. You might find it harder to trust others again. Say you have lost a dear one to illness. You might find it hard to trust say doctors, as my father did after he lost my mother prematurely to breast cancer.

Things might not be working out as you would wish. When life gets difficult, it becomes hard to believe everything will be alright. You might have a crisis of faith and feel depressed or anxious. For some it is about confidence. I might feel unsure that a particular circumstance or event will work out as I want. Will I be able to trust in what occurs? Will the future work out well? An anxious person will be plagued by doubt about that.

When things are going well, when we feel in the “flow”, that is when it is a lot easier. I am more “in the moment”. Somehow it is a lot easier to trust that what will happen will be OK. You walk with a confident step, speak with a confident voice, ask for what you want and find it is OK, move among large groups of people and feel safe, go to unfamiliar places and know that whatever happens you are safe and will be supported. All sorts of people, signs and occurrences will appear to support you just when you need it, even without asking.

Magic! So, what’s the difference? What’s changed?

Life, events, other people, circumstances, the runes, the stars, fate, God’s wishes for you, your karma? What do you think? Is this familiar?

Are the choices you make, the perceptions you have, the actions you take, dependent on others or events? Or on you? What’s changed?

Trust is something that comes from within. When we put on one side our fear and connect with our inner certainty, our belief in ourselves, who we are, a change takes place. It is a shift of perception. It is something we change within us. When that shift occurs, when we let go, all manner of things work out differently.

It is something I coach people on, how to develop their inner confidence. And the result is magic!

Inner strength, inner faith, inner confidence (Latin root “fides” meaning faith), knowing who you are, centred within yourself. It is something people who present know well, the day you have the wobbles and the day things sing. The journey is to know that inner state more and more.

Then, interestingly, we can trust what goes on out there too!